to Spook

Today was the day. We could see in his eyes that it would only be downhill from here and I put myself on autopilot and made the appointment with our vet. Dix said her emotional goodbyes and I let Spook ride in the car outside his carrier on the way to the clinic. Our vet apologized for making me wait in the exam room. I could barely get it out that I was happy for the extra time. Spook soaked up the attention from me and our vet. She gave him a good shot of Valium and returned with her assistant. Her assistant asked if this was "the mean one". He did manage to give them a snarl to uphold his reputation.

So, I took him home for burial. Tonight he spent a few hours with us lying in state on his kitchen box. It was the most natural thing - curled up as if he were sleeping like he spent most of his time of late. We proceeded with toast after toast to his making us laugh, and scold, and bleed, and laugh again. He's outside now on a snow pile and covered with a wash pan until we can dig his grave in the strawberry patch, one of his favorite secret hiding places.